make a move

I was going to write all about dystonia but as exhausting as that disorder it is, “my story” exhausts me even more.

I’m just going to go on and talk about art.  I came across this pin  of a painting by Norman Rockwell called “Picasso vs. Sargent” yesterday.  I keep Googling it because I don’t even believe it’s a thing.  Is it?  Go ahead and answer me if you know.

It just so happens that last weekend I made the executive decision in my mind to start looking closer at the paintings I enjoy viewing at The Art Institute of Chicago.  It also so happens that John Singer Sargent’s Mrs. George Swinton is one of the first ones I decided to focus on.  Here are my flash-free photos from Saturday.

Well, I think it’s cool.  Little things add up…
IMG_3248 IMG_3249

Oh, and if you would, please see my prior post and sign the petition if you haven’t already.  Thanks!

There’s a ribbon for that.

In case you weren’t aware, there’s a thing called Dystonia…


 and I have it.

I’ll be dedicating September’s posts to it, the theory behind how I got it, when/how I was diagnosed, and shamelessly asking you at the end of each post to please consider signing/sharing this petition in an effort to help raise awareness.

Thanks in advance and I hope you’ve had a good Labor Day weekend.


Whiskey, Bukowski, I love this Blogski.

I don’t even know if I like whiskey, it’s been awhile.  I do know I like this person’s tumblr blog.

Here we are with a DPS quote of truth and beauty that was put up last week.  



uh oh

6+ months later:

I will no longer blog about my hair.  Much.

I’ve finally come to the realization/belief that in a universe full of things and feelings, unrequited love has by far been the biggest waste of time, money, and energy I’ve ever experienced.  May none of you ever feel it, or at least identify it really early on and move on as quickly and painlessly as possible if you do. Amen.

I am strongly looking forward to Sons of Anarchy on 9/9.

There’s generosity and then there’s stupidity.

Anonymous blogging is not for me.

There’s a better than average chance I’ll be moving across the border within the next year.  To Wisconsin.

Meeting and liking someone who chooses to have nothing to do with social media is oddly refreshing.



experiencing technical difficulties

How are you?  Weather got you down?  I realized this morning that my robustness and ability to tolerate sub zero temperatures was left behind when I moved to Utah from Minnesota several years ago.

I’m having few IT issues right now and I’m on the same headache cycle as I was a month ago.  I’m not saying those two things are related, but the way I’m going about trying to resolve the problems?  Perhaps a new approach…

You want to know about my hair, right?  Of course you do.  I’d take a photo booth picture after a month of growth but my Mac is waiting for a new power brick.  Besides, it’s in a ponytail right now.  That’s right, it’s grown that much already.  I’m taking 5000 mcg of biotin a day and that seems to be working, if even on a placebo level.  I’m still not saying I regret the haircut and I still like how it looks, but it’s just not my thing at the moment.  My long hair was easy to not think about.  I’ve got a lot of tabs open.

Back to this.  I have a lot to say in this space but more to do around the house and elsewhere so I’ll go be grown uppity, prioritize and whatnot.

Should we talk about the weather?

Oh sure, let’s.  I haven’t minded being at home the past few days, it allowed some extra winter break days with my boy as school was called out yesterday and today.  I can’t say I accomplished great and glorious things because, well, I was just cold enough not to (crap windows abound at my abode).  Once again I’m grateful for indoor parking.  Fingers X the weather is passable this weekend.  That’s all.

Sweet Home Chicago, AP photo

How are you?

I’m feeling quite out of sorts myself.  I’m considering The Master Cleanse again.  I may start this week and will keep a decent journal on it if I do.

We made it to Target before what I understand is going to be another big round of snow tonight.  I don’t mind snow, it just causes a bit of havoc while driving in these parts.  I went to see a friend on NYD and had to say a little prayer when I launched myself out of the garage.  And as you may know, snow doesn’t give a soft white damn whom it touches (ee cummings) or whether we have places to go.

xo, have a brilliant remainder of the weekend.  I’m already looking forward to my French press & CBS Sunday Morning.  How very set in my ways of me.

Photo on 2014-01-04 at 16.39 #5

snow day

I meant to go spend the afternoon at the library but I was pretty sure my attempts at finding decent parking downtown would be slim to none in the snow.

I forgot to eat the kale on new year so I made it for lunch  in spaghetti sauteed in gremolata.  Deliciousness.

I hope your new year is off to a good start.  I have a lot more of this green stuff left so I guess I’ll make those chips with the rest of it.  I hope I don’t forget them in the oven as I’m wont to do.  This spaghetti looks very yellow.  It wasn’t that yellow.  Oh, that’s right, I’m the worst food photographer ever.

kale & pasta

you say you want a resolution…

Here ends 2013.  It was a pretty good year.  I did much better with the first half than the latter.  This year I all but conquered the migraines, went to school, and managed to stay relatively healthy and content.  Not too shabby.

2014 will be a year of work like I’ve not ever done before.  I’m not incredibly worried about my time, money, and energy now that I’ve trimmed some fat from my daily intake in all arenas.  As for resolutions, it’s more like a big ol’ to-do list.

So I’m sure I posted about making black eyed peas last new year as was tradition.  This year I did a search  and decided to switch it up a little.  I’m having lentils, oranges (see recipe below), long noodles, kale, and I think that might be enough for one person.

I wish you nothing but joy and good experiences.  And if the experience isn’t good, I hope the lesson is.

xo, see you in 2014

& p.s., you don’t get to see how mine turned out.  There was a bit of an incident with the Himalayan sea salt crystals.

and so hair it is part deux…and then I’m done talking about it, I hope.

And I quote myself in an email I sent to a friend yesterday…

“I made some big haircut announcement on my wall, then promptly took it down. I’m not up for the questions of “why”.” Believe me when I tell you that long hair gave me a false sense of something I can’t identify and it certainly didn’t give me any desired attention. I’m happy to have cut my hair more than having short hair if that makes sense.  I like this and don’t have a preference either way, though I don’t get into maintaining a “style” for very long.

I like this haircut very much, even 48 hours later.  I’m sure I’ll get the “why?” question again (not going to blast the person who asked it the first time, there we have yet another reason why he and I are no longer a couple) and anyone who asks that question doesn’t really deserve an answer, certainly not the one I gave in the email.

So then, if you’re still reading this and doing so correctly, I’m not keeping my hair short.   I am very curious to know how fast it grows.  I will be posting a monthly ‘do growth update…how long before it drives me mad? ;)

haircut four square

queue Edith Pilaf!

I won’t cry. Just sweep that sh.. away before I can see it.

The fact that CBS Sunday Morning just played a segment about the hotness of braids on the heels of me cutting a foot of hair off my head is not lost on me.   I’d been thinking of doing it for about six months and so it is done.

I liked my hair long but this haircut makes me happy.

haircut profile

flowers and garbage

Oh, well, here I go, I lasted over a month without blogging in this space.  I even tried to reinvent the blogging notion with A PAID BLOG but thankfully came to my senses within the 48 hour timeframe allotted for a came-to-my-senses refund.

I’ve got no real news and that’s really good news.  No one’s busting my chops or breaking my heart so what’s to blog about?

For now (“now” being 4:30am), I hope you had a really nice holiday and that you’re optimistic about 2014.  I know I am.

American Hustle.  Have you seen it?


“I am grateful for what I am and have. My thanksgiving is perpetual…O how I laugh when I think of my vague indefinite riches. No run on my bank can drain it, for my wealth is not possession but enjoyment.” ― Henry David Thoreau

“I am grateful for what I am and have. My thanksgiving is perpetual…O how I laugh when I think of my vague indefinite riches. No run on my bank can drain it, for my wealth is not possession but enjoyment.”  ― Henry David Thoreau

I wish you all a very happy and safe holiday season. I’m grateful for your visits and likes to my sometime-y blog.

I have much to do as 2013 rounds itself out. I hope my much to do means I’ll have much to say about my new path in 2014.

Thank you!


I’m the same old, same old, just not so much to yammer on about.  Things are fairly sorted out for me and there’s nothing fresh, new, cute, clever, or interesting to share.

I’m doing a thing or two in the next few days, maybe I’ll  have some earth shattering insight or experience to share as a result.  Or maybe everything will just remain as it is now.  Fine with me.

I hope you are well.

me and a journal

junk I love

It’s happened for me twice.  The first time was ten years ago in St. Cloud, MN. Margo Timmins, this beautiful person who sings like I imagine an angel sings, seems as part of the show, to choose a woman from the audience to lock eyes and sing a few lines together.  Twice I’ve been the one she’s chosen.  Last time it was during ‘Cause Cheap is How I Feel and last night it was Misguided Angel.  These were much needed interactions in both instances.  I’m grateful.

I believe in miracles…

I’m about to start reading/going through “A Course in Miracles“.  I’ve been interested in the book for a few years now and figure this is a good time to begin it as this, whether I like it or not, seems to be my season of bittersweet.

I’m starting off by reading Marianne Williamson‘s “A Return to Love“.  I’m reading that now and will be starting the “combined volume” of the course on October 29th.  If you are interested in reading along with me and/or discussing over the next year, contact me at

I think I’ve been at this blog for a year now.  I’m going to unloose some of my favorite, previous posts (most were hidden for lack of wanting to sort through them) just for the sake of my own reference and continuity.  The bittersweetness of those posts…like wanting something sweet and despite reading the label, biting into a bar of Baker’s chocolate.  It’s been a long year but I’ve learned a lot.  We can’t help who we love but loving ourselves first and self-respect is key to anything resembling good ever, ever happening for us.

Have a brilliant weekend and thank you for looking, liking, and following.


How me can I be?

I was going out for a redemptive hike on Friday and wanted to wear one of my mom’s rings.   I like to wear at least one piece of her jewelry when I’m adventure bound.  Well, I usually only wear rings on my right hand and the one I chose was too big for my ring finger and um, too small for my middle finger.  So I put the damn thing on anyway and ta-da!  It won’t come off.

I’d like to thank everyone in advance for any removal advice you may have but believe me, I tried your method and more (I get by with a little help from my friends, thank you, girls).  I’m going to have the ring cut off, probably on Wednesday.

There’s metaphor/analogy in here.  I’m just not in the mood to expand on it.

I hope your week is off to a good start.  And remember, if you have to force something to look beautiful, it probably isn’t meant to be.


I did it.

I actually said “yes” to going out last night.  I said “yes” again for next Saturday…what’s the big deal is that my fear of headaches has kept me wanting to be inside and home by myself for a really, really, long time.  I’ve done a few things and gone a few places with trusted parties but nothing new was even my radar.

Until now.  To say it’s so far so good would be an understatement.

I get by with a little help from my friends.


the quick brown eyed blogger jumps over any remembrance of how to type…

the quic k brown fox jumps over the lazy dog

the quck brown fox jumps over the laxy tod

the quck broun fox jumps over hte laxuy dog

the quck brown fox jumps over hte lac y dor

It just got worse the more I tried it!  I’ll get back to actual blogging next week. Maybe.

xo, have a nice weekend


Bukowski this.


from “For Jane.”

“225 days under grass
and you know more than I.
they have long taken your blood,
you are a dry stick in a basket.
is this how it works?
in this room
the hours of love
still make shadows.

when you left
you took almost
I kneel in the nights
before tigers
that will not let me be.

what you were
will not happen again.
the tigers have found me
and I do not care.”

Your next Netflix binge.

I feel like Ricky Gervais is one of the most conscientious, kind, talented, oh go on…

If you haven’t seen “Derek“, do so.  I think the best way to describe the show is a quote attributed to I don’t know who, and I’m likely paraphrasing, it disturbs the comfortable and comforts the disturbed.  I love it and will likely keep it in the continuous loop with The Office UK.

It’s brilliant.   God bless this atheist genius for making another show that’s more realistic than “reality TV” will ever be.

putting and pulling it together

I recently joined a book discussion group.  The book we are focusing on is The Gift of Imperfection by Brené Brown.

the-gifts-of-imperfection-5ipgg0hqI’ve tried and given up so many things in my so-far life that it seems vulnerability is a fool-hearted approach to living.  I’ve over-shared so many of my very personal stories only to have them come back to me in unsubtle and blatantly unkind ways.

I am interested in what Dr. Brown has to say as I like her approach and find her field of study interesting.   I have a pretty good story for my next post regarding vulnerability and the perception of perfection, it happened just today…

autumnal bliss and this…

I know a lot of people like fall.  It’s absolutely my favorite time as well, but I didn’t realize there were so many “what I love about fall” lists until I started seeing them on Pinterest.  It seems there are going to be a lot of hoodies worn on hayrides after watching football while candy corn and hot apple cider are consumed.

Do you know the “Bloody Mary” legend?  It was a slumber party staple when I was in grade school.


Bloody Mary is a folklore legend consisting of a ghost or spirit conjured to reveal the future. She is said to appear in a mirror when her name is called multiple times. The Bloody Mary apparition may be benign or malevolent, depending on historic variations of the legend. The Bloody Mary appearances are mostly “witnessed” in teenage group participation games, often as part of a game of truth or dare.

Historically, the ritual encouraged young women to walk up a flight of stairs backwards while holding a candle and a hand mirror, in a darkened house. As they gazed into the mirror, they were supposed to be able to catch a view of their future husband’s face.[1] There was, however, a chance that they would see a skull (or the face of the Grim Reaper) instead, indicating that they were destined to die before they married.[1][2]

A modern ritual addition of taunting Bloody Mary regarding her baby indicates the legendary figure’s tenuous connection to Queen Mary I, also known as “Bloody Mary”, whose life was marked by a number of miscarriages or false pregnancies.[3]

Bloody Mary allegedly appears as a corpse, a witch or a ghost; sometimes covered in blood. The lore surrounding the ritual (if she is summoned properly) states that participants may endure the apparition screaming at them, cursing them, strangling them, stealing their body or soul, drinking their blood,[4] or scratching their eyes out.[5]

Troxler’s fading,[6] self-hypnosis, and the Caputo Effect[7] have been posited as explanations for the Bloody Mary phenomena.

So naturally I’ve been cracking up ever since I saw this someecard.  :)

psl 3x

It’s good to have goals…

I’m setting goals for the last quarter of the year.  How about you?  Is there something you’d like to accomplish or just get started as 2013 rounds itself out?

This year has flown by scarily fast.

“They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.”  ~Andy Warhol


I hope you are doing well.

List to be published by 10/1 (haha, maybe).